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MyBabyConnection.com
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JULY 2004

Here is what you'll see in this issue of MyBabyConnection.com Newsletter

1. Feature Products
2. Article: How to Have a Happy Marriage When Your Busy Being Parents
3. Hot Sites to See!
4. Motherhood Quotes

Please support our sponsors above. MyBabyConnection.com would like to
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HOW TO HAVE A HAPPY MARRIAGE WHEN YOU'RE BUSY BEING PARENTS

By Elizabeth Pantley, Author of Kid Cooperation, Perfect Parenting and
Hidden Messages

Is your marriage everything you ever hoped it could be? Or has it been
pushed down your list of priorities since having children? Let's face
it, parenthood is a full-time job, and it dramatically changes your
marriage relationship. But marriage is the foundation upon which your
entire family is structured. If your marriage is strong, your whole
family will be strong; your life will be more peaceful, you'll be a
better parent, and you'll, quite simply, have more fun in your life.

MAKE A COMMITMENT
To create or maintain a strong marriage you will have to take the first
critical step: You must be willing to put time, effort and thought into
nurturing your marriage. The ideas that follow will help you follow
through on this commitment and will put new life and meaning into your
marriage. A wonderful thing may happen. You may fall in love with your
spouse all over again. In addition, your children will greatly benefit
from your stronger relationship. Children feel secure when they know
that Mom and Dad love each other-particularly in today's world, where 50
percent of marriages end in divorce; half of your children's friends
have gone, or are going through a divorce; or maybe it's your kids who
have survived a divorce and are now living in a new family arrangement.
Your children need daily proof that their family life is stable and
predictable. When you make a commitment to your marriage, your children
will feel the difference. No, they won't suffer from neglect! They'll
blossom when your marriage-and their homelife-is thriving.

The surprising secret is that this doesn't have to take any extra time
in your already busy schedule. Just a change in attitude plus a
committed focus can yield a stronger, happier marriage.

So here's my challenge to you. Read the following suggestions and apply
them in your marriage for the next 30 days. Then evaluate your marriage.
I guarantee you'll both be happier.

LOOK FOR THE GOOD, OVERLOOK THE BAD
You married this person for many good reasons. Your partner has many
wonderful qualities. Your first step in adding sizzle to your marriage
is to look for the good and overlook the bad.

Make it a habit to ignore the little annoying things - dirty socks on
the floor, a day-old coffee cup on the counter, worn out flannel
pajamas, an inelegant burp at the dinner table - and choose instead to
search for those things that make you smile: the way he rolls on the
floor with the baby; the fact that she made your favorite cookies, the
peace in knowing someone so well that you can wear your worn out
flannels or burp at the table.

GIVE TWO COMPLIMENTS EVERY DAY
Now that you've committed to seeing the good in your partner, it's time
to say it! This is a golden key to your mate's heart. Our world is so
full of negative input, and we so rarely get compliments from other
people. When we do get a compliment, it not only makes us feel great
about ourselves, it actually makes us feel great about the person giving
the compliment! Think about it! When your honey says, "You're the best.
I'm so glad I married you." It not only makes you feel loved, it makes
you feel more loving.

Compliments are easy to give, take such a little bit of time, and
they're free. Compliments are powerful; you just have to make the effort
to say them. Anything works: "Dinner was great, you make my favorite
sauce." "Thanks for picking up the cleaning. It was very thoughtful, you
saved me a trip." "That sweater looks great on you."

PLAY NICE
That may sound funny to you, but think about it. How many times do you
see -- or experience -- partners treating each other in impolite, harsh
ways that they'd never even treat a friend? Sometimes we take our
partners for granted and unintentionally display rudeness. As the saying
goes, if you have a choice between being right and being nice, just
choose to be nice. Or to put this in the wise words of Bambi's friend
Thumper, the bunny rabbit - "If you can't say somethin' nice don't say
nothin' at all."

PICK YOUR BATTLES
How often have you heard this advice about parenting? This is great
advice for child-rearing-and it's great advice to follow in your
marriage as well. In any human relationship there will be disagreement
and conflict. The key here is to decide which issues are worth pursuing
and which are better off ignored. By doing this, you'll find much less
negative energy between you.

>From now on, anytime you feel annoyed, take a minute to examine the
issue at hand, and ask yourself a few questions. "How important is
this?" "Is this worth picking a fight over?" "What would be the benefit
of choosing this battle versus letting it go?"

THE 60 SECOND CUDDLE
You can often identify a newly married couple just by how much they
touch each other - holding hands, sitting close, touching arms, kissing
- just as you can spot an "oldly-married" couple by how little they
touch. Mothers, in particular, often have less need for physical contact
with their partners because their babies and young children provide so
much opportunity for touch and cuddling that day's end finds them
"touched fulfilled".
So here's a simple reminder: make the effort to touch your spouse more
often. A pat, a hug, a kiss, a shoulder massage - the good feeling it
produces for both of you far outweighs the effort.

Here's the deal: Whenever you've been apart make it a rule that you will
take just 60 seconds to cuddle, touch and connect. This can be
addictive! If you follow this advice soon you'll find yourselves
touching each other more often, and increasing the romantic aspect of
your relationship.

SPEND MORE TIME TALKING TO AND LISTENING TO YOUR PARTNER
I don't mean, "Remember to pick up Jimmy's soccer uniform." Or "I have a
PTA meeting tonight." Rather, get into the habit of sharing your
thoughts about what you read in the paper, what you watch on TV, your
hopes, your dreams, your concerns. Take a special interest in those
things that your spouse is interested in and ask questions. And then
listen to the answers.

SPEND TIME WITH YOUR SPOUSE
It can be very difficult for your marriage to thrive if you spend all
your time being "Mommy" and "Daddy". You need to spend regular time as
"Husband" and "Wife". This doesn't mean you have to take a two-week
vacation in Hawaii. (Although that might be nice, too!) Just take small
daily snippets of time when you can enjoy uninterrupted conversation, or
even just quiet companionship, without a baby on your hip, a child
tugging your shirtsleeve or a teenager begging for the car keys. A daily
morning walk around the block or a shared cup of tea after all the
children are in bed might work wonders to re-connect you to each other.
And yes, it's quite fine to talk about your children when you're
spending your time together, because, after all, your children are one
of the most important connections you have in your relationship.

When you and your spouse regularly connect in a way that nurtures your
relationship, you may find a renewed love between you, as well as a
refreshed vigor that will allow you to be a better, more loving parent.
You owe it to yourself - and to your kids - to nurture your
relationship.

So take my challenge and use these ideas for the next 30 days. And watch
your marriage take on a whole new glow.

Parts of this article are excerpted with permission from books by
Elizabeth Pantley:
Kid Cooperation: How to Stop Yelling, Nagging and Pleading
Hidden Messages: What Our Words and Actions are Really Telling Our
Children
http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth
by New Harbinger Publications, Inc. and by McGraw-Hill/Contemporary

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**HOT SITES TO SEE**
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MiniTots - http://www.minitots.com

Brianna Babywear, Inc - http://www.Briannababy.com

Christening & Baby Shower Favors by Favor -
http://www.favorwarehouse.com

Children's Cottage - http://www.childrenscottage.net

Gorilla Playsets - http://www.gorillaplaysets.com

Watson's Birth Announcements - http://www.babybar.com

Baby Success - http://www.BabySuccess.com

Growing Tree Toys - http://www.growingtreetoys.com

Stork Radio - http://www.storkradio.com

Worldwide Surgical Equipment, Inc. - http://www.WorldwideSurgical.com

eBaby Banz - http://www.ebabybanz.com

Diaper Co - http://www.diaperco.com

Lulluby Creations - http://www.lullaby-creations.com

Swingworks - http://www.swingworks.com

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*MOTHERHOOD QUOTES*
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The phrase "working mother" is redundant.
~Jane Sellman

The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed
before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is
something absolutely new.
~Rajneesh

She never quite leaves her children at home, even when she doesn't take
them along.
~Margaret Culkin Banning

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A
mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her
child.
~Sophia Loren, Women and Beauty

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We will announce July's Prize Winner in the August Newsletter
October 2004 will be the Next Drawing for Prizes below:

FREE $10 GIFT CERTIFICATE FOR DIAPERS
FREE CHILD DEVELOPMENT PROGRAM from MyLittleSteps.com
FREE $20 GIFT CERTIFICATE from MyMiracleBaby
FREE BABY SONGS VIDEO from BabySongs.com
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If you have any questions concerning this newsletter or above articles,
you can e-mail me at

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All information is copyrighted. Be sure to get permission from the
author to reprint any of the above information.

Michelle Floyd
www.MyBabyConnection.com
Connecting YOU to the Best Baby Sites on the web!